Let’s be better to each other.


“He called me a jerkface.”

“Well, are you a jerkface?”


“Then he’s not telling the truth and you don’t need to worry about what he said. Just keep not being a jerkface.”

It could be that easy. Really.

If you’re not a jerkface, when someone yells “Hey jerkface!” don’t answer them.

Instead of stressing about other people’s opinions and instead of over-reacting to gossip, we could just keep going about our own business, defining ourselves by our actions.

We could take people at face value. Instead of playing the “She said X but I think she really meant Y” card, we could just go off of X. We could assume the best about people’s motives and stop interjecting a subtext under conversations.

We  could genuinely hope the best for one another and  celebrate someone’s achievement without comparing it to our own or tearing down some other part of that person’s life.

We could deal with conflict one on one instead of involving a huge circle of people or the internet. We could stop passive aggressive facebook and twitter bickering.

I tried to get some of the above across to a teenager last night at youth group. I wasn’t articulate. I hadn’t found precise words yet. Still, she got the general idea. She said something like “That only works when you do it.” Not true! Please prove her wrong.

Let’s be better to each other.

About SaraBSutter

I serve as the pastor of United Presbyterian Church in Goldfield, Iowa. My husband Steve and I are excited to be in a friendly small town and look forward to the years ahead. In addition to nerdy church stuff, I love reading books, writing, good coffee, cats, and football.

2 responses »

  1. I had a similar discussion w/ the kid last week. Someone was baiting him & started in on insulting me. I asked him if the insults were true (“No.”), and said “What they say doesn’t change what you know.” This was all after the fact, after things had escalated too far, but I’m hoping it’ll sink in next time.

    Excellent post. :-]


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